Revisiting Jordache Jeans TV Commercials

By Margaret Crandall

Remember Jordache Jeans? Sing along with me: “You’ve got the look I want to know better. You’ve got the look that’s all together. Working, playing, day or night; Jordache has the fit that’s right. The Jordache look!” 

The jingle was catchy, right? But my GOD, the TV ads have not aged well. Take a cringe-walk with me down memory lane, but be warned: Once you go down this rabbit hole, there’s no telling when you will come back out of it.

We’ve got the modeling shoot, a twangy ride-the-mechanical-bull cowgirl version, working out with one-pound weights, one about teenagers’ parents getting divorced, and OMG the new-wave version. Each video I click on is worse than the one before. My favorite is this one, with the forced snapping dance for the rhythmically challenged. What are those people even DOING?

I have some questions, including but not limited to: Did I try to dance like that? And if so, why didn’t anyone stop me? Were Jordache Jeans jeans really that tight? Did I want a flat butt? Were these ads trashed in feminist circles at the time? And most importantly, HOW is it that 1980s fashion is cool again??? 

Calgon, take me away.

Originally Published November 9, 2021.