Year: 2020

Get Tickets to TueNight Live: High Anxiety!

Hey TueNighters! Please join us 6/2 at 8pm for a fabulous night of interactive fun, stories and music for our first virtual TueNight Live! For those who haven’t been to one of our events in NYC now is your chance.  For this virtual edition our theme is High Anxiety and we’re turning things into an old-school, interactive variety show with storytellers, musicians and more on Crowdcast. Join host, Margit Detweiler and friends for an evening of fun, chat and true stories. Our guests include: Jill Sobule  —musician Bassey Ikpi  — author of I’m Telling the Truth But I’m Lying; poet, writer, and mental health advocate Kat Kinsman  — author, Hi Anxiety; Senior Editor Food and Wine. Robin Gelfenbien  — storyteller, founder Yum’s The Word storytelling  A portion of the proceeds will go to Crisis Text Line – an organization that provides free, 24/7 mental health support via text message. Text HELLO to 741741 for free, 24/7 crisis counseling. We hope to see you there! Margit

Roller Boogie: My Pandemic Security Blanket

One of my earliest pandemic projects was to clean out my desk alcove, which I often refer to as “the Dorian Gray of my apartment,” because it’s where I stash anything and everything I don’t want to see. The depth of that mess is no exaggeration or hyperbole, as evidenced by me finding – while cleaning and organizing – a DVD that I failed to return to the rental place at least 15 years ago (I’d been juggling a full-time day job and part-time graduate night school and apparently couldn’t be bothered).  It was the 1979 movie, Roller Boogie.  My first reaction to that discovery was a mildly upset and anxious, “Ooops.” Which was quickly followed by my second reaction: “Oh, HELL yes.” That night, I popped the DVD into my old laptop, and, like something out of an Olivia Newton-John song from a different roller-skating movie, it was pure magic. Because despite being here, now, in the ominous gloom of 2020, sheltering-in-place alone in my Brooklyn apartment while the global Coronavirus pandemic grimly ravaged …

Kathy Valentine

TueNight 10: Kathy Valentine

Age: 61 Bio: Kathy Valentine has been writing songs and playing in bands non-stop for 45 years — lots of un-famous ones, and one that made music history: the Go-Go’s. And now she has released a book: All I Ever Wanted: A Rock n’ Roll Memoir from University of Texas Press with an accompanying soundtrack. Beyond the Bio: If I’m lucky enough to get a standard issue life span, then I’m acutely aware that I’m on the “other” side of the bell curve and feel a sense of urgency to keep productive—hyper motivated to create, and live each day in a very present and fully realized way. And besides getting shit done, and getting it done better than I ever have, I’m rocking and rolling and being the biggest not-giving-AF goofball I’ve ever been. What makes you a grown-ass lady? Becoming a mom right before turning 44 made me a grown-ass lady. Before that, I was still a baby-ass lady. Here’s her TueNight 10: 1. On the nightstand: It might be easier to say what’s NOT on my nightstand, but I’ll try: Books, …

Karen Finlay smiling at book store

TueNight 10: Karen Finlay

(Karen Finlay at Alibi Bookshop. Photo by Lynn Landry.) Age: 51 Bio: Karen is the co-owner of Alibi Bookshop in Vallejo, CA. She has an MFA in Creative Writing from Mills College, spent nearly 20 years in the publishing industry (Lonely Planet, Chronicle Books), and is the co-founder of The Mid-Century Supper Club Potluck, a yearly festival of questionable foodstuffs. She lives with her husband, Jon, and their two dogs. Beyond the Bio: I did try to bake bread. It would have been a perfect field hockey puck. I’m trying every day to be grateful, to take everything as it comes, to remain positive, and never take anything for granted. What makes you a grown-ass lady? I’m responsible, I have adult trappings, I’m glad I’m no longer young, I like the age I am, and I’m glad I’ve gotten this far. But I still get really excited about things and am not jaded, and it helps that I still have the same friends since first grade, so we keep one another young and mindful of all of our stages …

Elana Frankel

TueNight 10: Elana Frankel

Age: “Old enough” Bio: Elana is a founder (indigonandhaze.com); author and writer (Women and Weed, the book); Editor in Chief (Women and Weed, the magazine). She’s worked for One Kings Lane (creative director), Architectural Digest,Martha Stewart Living, The New York Times, WSJ/Off Duty, New York Magazine and Oprah (to name a few). She also teaches yoga and meditation.  Beyond the Bio: “Aging up, I became a stronger performer, collaborator, influencer, strategist, maker, doer, communicator, team builder, and public speaker.” What makes you a grown-ass lady? “I speak my mind…and yours.” Here’s her TueNight 10: 1. On the nightstand: Indigo and Haze body lotion, New Highs CBD and CBG tinctures, a Tibetan singing bowl, animal spirit cards and a weaving my son made in art class. High thread-count hippie stuff.  2. Can’t stop/won’t stop: Focusing on safe access, education, and inspiration around the plant.  3. Jam(s) of the minute: Gangstagrass, Lucky Chops, and Yola  4. Thing I miss: Charivari  5. ’80s crush: Michael Hutchence   6. Current crush: My husband (Me: “You really are my crush.” Him: “I know.”) 7. Latest fave find: Linen bed sheets  8. Last thing you lost: My sense …

Wenderella: A Gen-X Fairytale of Viruses and Princesses

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful middle-aged woman named Wendi. Or Wenderella, as she called herself one night after she took a lot of cold medicine and watched RuPaul’s Drag Race. Wenderella lived in a far-off, foreign land called TEXAS in a big, big castle. More specifically, a single-story house in a cul-de-sac that was a little too tame for her liking, but whatever, the school district’s good. Not everybody needs to be Carrie Bradshaw. Wenderella ruled her queendom along with her dashing husband and two strong teenage sons. There were also a couple cats and a white dog you may have seen on Instagram. But they were a happy family because they didn’t see each other very often. They frequently did something called “going places.” All was well. All was good. Until one day when everything changed.  “Hear ye, hear ye! There’s an evil disease afoot!” Wenderella’s husband proclaimed to the family. “We must stay inside our castle, or we shall perish!” Why did she order so many rice cakes on Instacart? …

TueNight 10: Cat Greenleaf

Age: 48 Bio: Cat is the creator of Talk Stoop on NBC which she hosted from her Cobble Hill townhouse for nearly a decade. Now, at her present home in Coney Island, she and her family play on the beach & make upcycled furniture for their #ZeroWaste home staging and interiors biz, Greenleaf & Sons. Beyond the Bio: “Presently, the world is loopy for everybody — over 40, under 40, or eternally 40 like me! But my life has been inside out for the past three years: working through depression, losing my job, facing financial upheaval, adjusting to a new family structure. And now I’m here, finally out of those weeds. Grateful and changed. Then COVID-19 came to town and the earth shook again. Since our foundation had already fallen away, we’d already had to rebuild. And since I spent a long time in bed — a long time — I’m already back up on my feet.  Our hearts are breaking daily along with everyone else’s, but we’re able to support our loved ones facing terrifying uncertainty today because we’ve so recently weathered our …

I’m Willing to Dye for Normalcy

I haven’t worn makeup in 34 days. Or pants, for that matter. Since my family and I decamped from our New York City apartment to our upstate home, I wake up every day and slip on one of the two pairs of black leggings I have with me, and one of two stretched-out sports bras. Apparently, when packing for a pandemic, it’s smarter to bring an assortment of workout clothes than it is to bring cute sweaters. Those sweaters, along with a couple of pairs of jeans, remain folded in my duffel bag, next to the flat iron I thought I might use.  Use for what? To make my rooty hair look better as I trudge between my kitchen and garbage shed for the hundredth time? Or sit across a silent breakfast table from my shell-shocked family who could care less how I, or they, look? I was never much one for elaborate beauty routines but my regimen has now been reduced to face splashing and teeth brushing. Last night I tweezed my eyebrows for …

TueNight 10: Sulyn Silber

Age: 52 Quick bio: Sulyn has been a personal trainer for 20 years and a massage therapist for 14. She has recently moved from NYC to Denver to spend more time in nature, and more specifically, in the mountains. During the Covid-19 pandemic, as a professional who relies on in-person workouts, she switched up her business to offer customized virtual personal training sessions. She mixes her simple DIY workouts with a badass personalized playlist from her days as a DJ.  Beyond the Bio:  “Turning 50 was huge. I found more confidence in my daily life and I wasn’t afraid to ruffle feathers, but I also realized that I had the power to defuse situations. Part of this comes from my daily meditation practice, which started in 2014, and from endless hours of talk therapy. Being in my 5th decade on this planet, I live life as fully as I can, each and every day. And I try to find kindness in moments that may have eluded me in my younger days.” What makes you a grown-ass lady?  “Being …

What Our Country Has Lost With Corona We’ve Lost Before

I wrote this poem in 2001, just days after 9/11, when I was 25 years old and living in Brooklyn. Reading it now, at 43, in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, I am experiencing similar feelings of grief, anger, suspicion, confusion about what this means for our civil rights, and yes, fear of going to war once the dust settles (because let’s be honest, the U.S. cannot let ineptitude go unpunished, even when its our own). The reason I want to share this poem now is because I know that fear and turning a blind eye to injustice increased exponentially in the decade following 9/11, and I’m hoping that doesn’t happen this time around.  “A Matter of Gray” Questions have come to visit mea life led carelessly is hard to organizeprioritize, re-schedule, pencil inagain. I spent those first days looking for clues, conducting my own “investigation”unraveling global maps gone dusty to find the jagged, colored section with which to drop my rageI placed a push-pin there like people dowhen they have visited a place… or hope toas if …

TueNight 10: Katie Rosman

Age: 48 Quick bio: Katie is a reporter for the New York Times. As she puts it, she’s “in the business of knowing other people’s business.”  Like many reporters, Katie’s usual features beat has shifted to covering COVID-19 — she wrote about the outbreak in Seattle and shared tips for staying sane through the crisis. Katie is also the author of the memoir, If You Knew Suzy. And she’s started making these wonderful, hand-stitched dinner napkins.  Beyond the Bio: “I’m worried. I’m bored. I’m wearing sweatpants for the 23rd consecutive day. But I’m also very grateful because I’m healthy, I’m employed and I’m privileged beyond description. My goal each day is to stay connected to the gratitude. But it takes work because, basically, my anxiety’s got anxiety.” What makes you a grown-ass lady? “Not apologizing for what I shouldn’t be sorry for, and being the first to say sorry when I fuck up.” 1. On the nightstand: Separation Anxiety by Laura Zigman. Hand sanitizer.  2. Can’t stop/won’t stop: Diet Coke 3. Jam of the minute: “Ain’t No Man” by Angaleena Presley 4. Thing I miss: Walking out the front door. …

Child hugs Mom during downward dog

Finding Equilibrium: When You Both Need Care

My jaw clenches as he yells at me from less than two feet away about a video game character’s ability to perform some amazing feat I immediately tune out, despite the loudness of the words being drilled into my head. He’s woken up far earlier than usual, and the things I needed to do to make sure that I am taking care of myself before he gets up are forcefully blown into the wind, like someone else’s heartfelt desires against dandelion seeds. “Please lower your voice. I’m standing right here.” “I’M NOT YELLING.”  He says this genuinely; without guile or sarcasm. “I know you don’t think you’re yelling, but trust me when I tell you, it sounds way louder out here than it does in there. And you have to remember that there are other people in this house; we’re not home alone anymore. Please lower your volume.” He scowls, takes in a breath, and then proceeds to say the exact same thing at the exact same volume, except now in a deeply exasperated tone. …

TueNight 10: Tara Shaver

Tara hikes a glacier in South Iceland in winter — 3 years after an unexpected total hip replacement (Photo provided by Tara) Age: 41 Quick bio: Tara is a volunteer engagement advisor with AARP by day and moonlights as a video storyteller. She is currently promoting her COVID-19 Chronicles, which documented her household’s journey with this coronavirus, including a crowd-sourced Q&A. “My boyfriend and I were two of the first people in Tennessee to be diagnosed with COVID-19. We had symptoms of the virus for 12-14 days and have been released from observation by public health since March 21. Since we have fully recovered, we are now participating in a COVID-19 vaccine study conducted by Vanderbilt University, and taking steps to donate plasma specifically for COVID-19 therapies.” Beyond the Bio:  “I’m a self-proclaimed city bumpkin. Born and raised in a small community outside of a small town in rural north Alabama, I love the conveniences and variety of city life, while embracing the best parts of ‘my raising.’ World traveler. Shoe junkie. List maker. Life changer. Curly Girl.” What …

That Time Simon LeBon Worked in My Office

Like many 13-year-old girls in 1984, I often dreamed that Duran Duran’s Simon Le Bon would one day randomly show up at my door. Unlike most of those girls, however, that actually ended up happening to me. And the story is nuts. In the early ‘00s, I worked at Rykodisc, an independent record label. If you are “of a certain age,” you may remember Ryko for its David Bowie, Elvis Costello, and Frank Zappa CD reissues and/or its trademark green CD cases. The Business Affairs office, where I worked, was located outside of Philadelphia in Main Line suburban Bryn Mawr, PA, in a nondescript compound: Ryko had the building in the front (an old 1920s-era stone mansion), while RuffNation’s successor company occupied the two brick stable buildings in the back, which they had renovated and converted into offices and a state-of-the-art recording studio. One day, our office manager (we’ll call him Eric) brought some payment approvals or something upstairs to my office for signature. Eric was about 6 years younger than me, in a pop …

TueNight 10: Tyrese Coleman

Age: 40 years old today! (April 1) Quick bio: Tyrese L. Coleman is the author of the collection, How to Sit, a 2019 Pen Open Book Award finalist published with Mason Jar Press in 2018. Writer, wife, mother, attorney, and writing instructor, she is a contributing editor at Split Lip Magazine and her essays and stories have appeared in several publications, including Black Warrior Review, Literary Hub, The Rumpus, and the Kenyon Review.  Beyond the Bio: “Life right now is all about ‘sheltering in place’ because of the COVID-19 pandemic. This means that I am cooped up in the house with my family and socializing via video chat. However, I have discovered some positives. One is that I have money since I am not out spending it. And another is that I have started jogging, something that I never thought I would be into. I always thought that the idea of ‘going for a run to clear my mind’ was something people just said, but it is actually true.” What makes you a grown-ass lady? …

Moo Sexy: Getting Out of My Comfort Zone for Love

Ten years ago, my boyfriend, Greg, and I are lying in bed on a lazy Sunday afternoon when he says he needs to talk to me about something. My mind instantly goes into overdrive. OMG. He’s cheating on me. He has an STD. He’s breaking up with me. Maybe all three! Thankfully, it’s none of these things, but it’s the last thing I expect to hear. “You don’t make me feel special,” he says. Whaaaaaat?! I think. As the shock takes over, my heart breaks. Over the past year, I’ve done all kinds of things to make him feel special. I’ve written him love notes that I hide in his dresser and in his bathroom (not under the toilet seat). I’ve cooked him dinner when he’s the far better cook. On his birthday, I gave him specific hard-to-find gifts that he’d casually mentioned months earlier in conversation. I’ve even folded his laundry despite the fact that he possesses the one quality I find sexiest in a man: He can fold a fitted sheet. I’m truly …

Corona Parenting: Do My Kids Need to See Me Cry?

Photo of Ericka by Sarah Sido I was lying next to my seven-year-old son at bedtime. He doesn’t ask for this often because he knows I always say no. One week ago, I had two backpacks to unload, two lunch containers to scrub peanut butter off the sides of, a dishwasher to fill and run, as well as make sure their basketball outfits were cleaned for the after-school game, and sweep all the rice, Legos, sand off the floor before finally settling down to get to my work, which was memorizing lines for an audition or sitting down to edit photos for a deadline. 8pm was my time, my alone time, my work time. But now there is no work. And none in sight. There are no bento box containers to clean, no backpacks to unload. There is little to organize or prepare for. The sports gear is already shoved away deep in the closet. So I laid with my oldest son. Because I had no excuse and really, why not? We are all anxious …

TueNight 10: Barbara Rushkoff

Age: ‘Old,’ as my kid says. Actual: 58. Feels like: 12 on a good day. Basic Bio:  Barbara Rushkoff is a former ’zine editor (Plotz), fact-checker (People) and music writer. Her latest project is under the guise of yr_resting_stitchface on Instagram where she makes embroidery stitch art of people who have made a creative impact on her life. Beyond the Bio:  “I’m a perpetual late bloomer, so having a kid in my early 40s made a lot of sense. I live in a small town just outside of NYC, where I am pretty sure no one cleans to post-punk music or remembers most of the people I’m embroidering. I recall that time in my life when music was so interesting and new and people connected with each other through live shows, record stores and making mixed tapes for each other. I miss that. Mid-life crisis through music and memory? Maybe. But I’m enjoying the people I’m connecting with on this new level.”  What Makes You a Grown Ass Lady: “Acceptance. Just accepting where I am right now, and …

Horses run free in Mexico

Fear and Fresh Air: How Two Trips to Mexico Set Me Free

My lifelong bad habit of not reading the fine print has been rivaled only by my bad habit of ignoring relationship red flags. Ignoring the fine print landed my acrophobic ass on a pissed-off horse on the edge of a cliff in Mexico. Ignoring red flags landed me in a second marriage that should not have been a second date. I survived both situations. But only now, nearly four years after that trip to Mexico and nearly three years after I left that marriage, do I realize how the former set the stage for the latter. To be honest, the fine print wasn’t really fine. All the pertinent text was the same font size on the horseback riding adventure company’s website. I just didn’t give much thought to what “exciting and rugged” and “our horseback rides are definitely not nose-to-tail, unless you choose so,” might actually mean. And I failed to register just how high “150-foot cliffs” are. I just booked a reservation for three, my daughters and me, and looked forward to riding a …

TueNight 10: Babita Patel

Age: 40 Quick Bio: Babita jets around the world as a humanitarian photographer and Executive Director of KIOO Project, a nonprofit that changes gender dynamics by teaching photography to girls who then teach boys. Her upcoming book, Breaking Out in Prison, introduces you to 15 men who were locked out of society long before they were locked up. Beyond the Bio: “My life at 40 looks nothing like I thought it would when I was 22. Starting a nonprofit, writing a book, my travel adventures have all landed in my lap while I was making myself crazy over ridiculous goals that were a waste of my time and energy. I finally decided to let the universe have its way while I stepped out of its way.” What makes you a grown-ass lady? “I don’t say ‘Yes’ when I really mean ‘No.‘ “ 1. On the nightstand: Invisible Women by Caroline Criado Perez 2. Can’t stop/won’t stop: Dancing around my apartment like no one is watching 3. Jam of the minute: “Songs to Sing in the Shower” playlist 4. Thing I miss: My bed the second I …

Jenny in the Sarconic Islands

Get Lost: The Awesome, Scary, Wonder of My Midlife Travel

One early afternoon about 12 years ago I took three left turns and two right turns along the dense streets of Hanoi, Vietnam — and promptly found myself unutterably lost. I’d arrived for my first-ever visit to the city after a 24-hour journey from my home in Brooklyn late the night before — and as elegant women wearing conical straw hats pedaled past me on bicycles weighted down by flowers and produce, I stood on a street corner there possessed of no phone, no shared language, no context, no map, no prior understanding, no deep wisdom of the culture I’d found myself in, nothing to fall back on. Who knew what might happen next? I was at once a little scared and a whole lot delighted. Now, at 56, “a little scared and a whole lot delighted” is a disposition I’ve developed an unexpected propensity for in these ripe middle years of my life. This propensity is pretty much the dead opposite of what I imagined wanting for my grownup self when I was young …

TueNight 10: Vanessa DeLuca

Vanessa with Angela Bassett at an Essence Black Women in Hollywood event Age: 55 Basic bio: Vanessa is the Editor in Chief of ZORA magazine, a Medium publication by, for and about women of color. Last month they released the ZORA Canon, a curated compilation of 100 must-read books written by African-American women over the last 160 years. Beyond the Bio: “I have one kid who’s a sophomore in college, and one who’s a junior in high school, so I don’t feel that tug and pull of guilt about being a working mom the way I used to. It’s still hard to accept that my children are this old, and that I am this old, but I’m powering through it.” What makes you a grown-ass lady? “I spend little time apologizing for dipping out on invitations to events that I really don’t want to attend anyway. I let my intuition/gut be my guide about what’s worth the time and what isn’t.” 1. On the nightstand: My cholesterol and high blood pressure medications; with my family’s medical history, I …

TueNight 10: Roberta Lombardi

Age: 53 Quick Bio: Roberta is a three-year breast cancer survivor and founder and president of Infinite Strength, a nonprofit that provides financial assistance to underserved/underinsured women diagnosed with breast cancer. Many of the women helped by her organization are single mothers who are financially disadvantaged and/or below the poverty level. Beyond the bio: “I was diagnosed with breast cancer at 49 after I discovered a lump during a self-exam. I feel like I was just learning to embrace myself at that time: not concerned as much with what other people thought of me, and just enjoying life and my family. I loved my 40s! And then came the diagnosis. I lost my breasts, hair, self-esteem and dignity. When I was through with treatment I had to figure out who I was because I did not recognize myself, and it was a tough road.” What makes you a grown-ass lady?: “Having breast cancer pretty much stripped me down to the bone emotionally. But in a lot of ways that was a good thing as I began …

TueNight 10: Jennifer Owens

Age: 52 Quick bio: Jennifer is an editor, writer and speaker who tells stories to and about women, with a focus on career, family and health. She works with clients through Jennwork, her two-year-old content agency, and her newest project, The Breadwinners podcast, just launched on Messy.fm. Jennifer serves on the board of ProCon.org. Her punk band Two Minute Thrills plays in dive bars (where else?) around NYC. Beyond the bio: “I feel like I’m in the perfect moment right now. My kids are older and (literally) need less hand-holding, my spouse still makes me laugh, Pilates has me standing straighter than ever and I get invited to shout obscenities on various stages. Then there’s my work, which is all about speaking authentically to women. I love it — and love the people I get to work with.” What makes you a grown-ass lady? “That I’m still supporting my family despite the crumbling nature of media. I started out as a newspaper reporter, pivoted to magazines, moved to digital and now audio. I just keep hustling.” 1. On the nightstand: There are sooooo …

Embarking on My Own Year of Yes

I’ll allow Shonda Rhimes to take credit for inventing the year of yes (YOY). This TV titan did make it famous, but let the record show that I invented the concept before Rhimes’ book with the same name became an instant bestseller.  In 2014, I could be found lounging on a tan leather couch in my comfort zone. I had a cool gig as the executive editor of Juicy, a celeb life, hair and beauty magazine, which I co-founded with my soul friend Paula. At Juicy, the riskiest thing I did was subject my skin, hair and nails to all the free goodies beauty brands tossed at us by the boatload. Picture me as an eager test dummy for every BB Cream for mocha skin, matte red lipstick and neon nail lacquer ever invented. I interviewed celebrities, twirled on red carpets and on the rare occasion, appeared on reality TV.  And while all of this was crazy, sexy, cool in that TLC kinda way, I never forgot that one of my purposes in life was …

TueNight 10: Karen Dukess

Age: 57 Bio: Karen is the author of the novel The Last Book Party, which was published in July by Henry Holt. She has been a tour guide in the former Soviet Union, a newspaper reporter in Florida, a magazine publisher in Russia and a speechwriter on gender equality for the United Nations Development Programme. She lives with her family near New York City and spends as much time as possible in Truro on Cape Cod. Beyond the Bio: “I’m the quintessential late bloomer, writing my first novel in my 50s. Our culture celebrates young success, but I’ve learned from experience that late-in-life achievements are all the sweeter. And publishing your first novel just as your youngest child goes to college is a great antidote to empty nest syndrome.” What makes you a grown-ass lady? “I’m much more likely to try new things and not worry about how well I do them or how foolish I might look. Only well after age 40 did I have the guts to learn to downhill ski, scuba dive, and …

The Greatest Risk of All? Choosing Me

I’m an avowed risk-taker.  In fact, I had a business card for a while that bragged about this. I tucked the word “instigator” on there, between “editor” and “writer.” In my career I launched four magazines in a row, and lived to tell – though I can’t say the same for the magazines. I wrote a really raw book about my divorce in which I cried constantly and told the truth about my failures. I joined websites solely for the purpose of finding people to have sex, not relationships. I offend people with my confidence and bluntness and brio – but I don’t mean to.  I like to stir pots and poke bees’ nests and ask inappropriate questions and hold people’s gazes too long. So I got this idea in my head that I was fearless. Turns out that was a lie. I’m a total scaredy-cat. This I have learned in the past ten years, ten years of being unemployed, underemployed and just plain overlooked. In my career, I had enjoyed decades of unwavering success, …

TueNight Live: Photos from RISK

All photos by Neil Kramer For some people, standing up and sharing a personal story feels risky — luckily for the record crowd (almost 120 of you!) at our most recent TueNight event, this was not the case, as 5 women stood up and shared stories of risks taken in their own lives. And we got to hear the good, the bad, the embarrassing, and the lovely. Margit welcomed the crowd to the event, held at the women’s career development and collaboration hub, Luminary. Here she is with Robin Gelfenbein, one of the night’s readers, who offered up a super-special second, bonus story at the end of the night (in which weiners featured prominently — we mean hot dogs!). The event’s speakers shared stories of their own personal risks, involving family (of course), career, identity, taking on new challenges, and sexxxxxxy time… gone wrong. Read those stories here, here, and here, or watch the videos of their performances on our Facebook page. There was fun, laughter, snacks, wine, Hint Water (thanks for sponsoring!), new connections …

The Risk Issue

We each have a list of things we’ll risk, and a list of things we — hell no — will not. Like, I’ll risk talking to a stranger on the subway, risk changing jobs or risk standing on stage to share my thoughts and feelings (Haayy TueNight Live!) But I would never risk skydiving — honestly, I feel like I’m taking a risk every time I get into ANY moving vehicle. Bodily risks are not my thing.  I am not too keen on risking strange meats. I might risk taking a hit of that joint, even though the voice of my mother yelling, “IT COULD BE LACED WITH SOMETHING!” still plays on a backchannel in my brain.  At midlife, we hold many more calculations in our head, experiences to pull from, to decide if the risk is worth it. We can better gauge where the line is, and the categories where we’ll tempt fate, and where we’ll hold our cards. I feel a little less risky as I’ve grown older; I’ve found myself looking for safety …